Tuesday, April 14, 2009

The Lesson of the Worry Bead

During a job hunting break today, I watched a documentary focusing on children's reactions to September 11th. Kids always strike me as profound in the midst of tragedy because their approach isn't marred by the need to mince words and be politically correct. Usually (hopefully) they haven't been corrupted by hateful/irational reactions imposed upon them by the adults in their lives. They see things in a simple way. In any event, I was just watching this documentary to pass the time when the camera focused in on a little girl seemingly doing arts and crafts. It turns out that she was in a grief counseling center where her teacher taught them to make beads out of clay. Two lumps of clay are rolled together to form a ball (or a bead) and a hole is poked in the top. You whisper your worry into the hole and then it is locked there forever. She showed her finished bead to the camera and said "see, the worry is locked in here. sometimes, they come back but not really." This reminded me of a sermon I heard in church back when I was stressed out of my mind and studying for the bar exam. The minister said that so many people bring their worries to the alter, pray about them and walk out of church with the same worries as if worrying somehow changes reality. He encouraged laying the worries down and having faith that all things will work out. That is also a central theme of the book I've been reading. Focus on the positive and it will come to you. If you focus on the negative, you will get stuck in it and good cannot come to you. Its the lesson of the worry bead. It got me through the bar exam, my first job hunting process, a major health crisis (don't know if I mentioned that I have lupus) and it can surely get me through this. As much as I like to control things and know what to expect, things work best for me when I am faithful that all things will work out rather than starting each day noting that I am still waiting for a breakthrough. In the meantime, I have to focus on what I can control: my attitude and my actions. Maybe I'll busy myself with bead making. I've got a lot of whispering to do. Hopefully my husband doesn't think I've completely lost my mind.

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